Tuesday, July 27, 2021

"It is obscene"

 In a June essay, celebrated Nigerian author Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie mourned the decline of good-faith conversation, especially online. 

https://www.chimamanda.com/news_items/it-is-obscene-a-true-reflection-in-three-parts/

quote:

"In certain young people today like these two from my writing workshop, I notice what I find increasingly troubling: a cold-blooded grasping, a hunger to take and take and take, but never give; a massive sense of entitlement; an inability to show gratitude; an ease with dishonesty and pretension and selfishness that is couched in the language of self-care; an expectation always to be helped and rewarded no matter whether deserving or not; language that is slick and sleek but with little emotional intelligence; an astonishing level of self-absorption; an unrealistic expectation of puritanism from others; an over-inflated sense of ability, or of talent where there is any at all; an inability to apologize, truly and fully, without justifications; a passionate performance of virtue that is well executed in the public space of Twitter but not in the intimate space of friendship.

I find it obscene.

There are many social-media-savvy people who are choking on sanctimony and lacking in compassion, who can fluidly pontificate on Twitter about kindness but are unable to actually show kindness. People whose social media lives are case studies in emotional aridity. People for whom friendship, and its expectations of loyalty and compassion and support, no longer matter. People who claim to love literature – the messy stories of our humanity – but are also monomaniacally obsessed with whatever is the prevailing ideological orthodoxy. People who demand that you denounce your friends for flimsy reasons in order to remain a member of the chosen puritan class.

People who ask you to ‘educate’ yourself while not having actually read any books themselves, while not being able to intelligently defend their own ideological positions, because by ‘educate,’ they actually mean ‘parrot what I say, flatten all nuance, wish away complexity.’

People who do not recognize that what they call a sophisticated take is really a simplistic mix of abstraction and orthodoxy – sophistication in this case being a showing-off of how au fait they are on the current version of ideological orthodoxy.

People who wield the words ‘violence’ and ‘weaponize’ like tarnished pitchforks. People who depend on obfuscation, who have no compassion for anybody genuinely curious or confused. Ask them a question and you are told that the answer is to repeat a mantra. Ask again for clarity and be accused of violence. (How ironic, speaking of violence, that it is one of these two who encouraged Twitter followers to pick up machetes and attack me.)

And so we have a generation of young people on social media so terrified of having the wrong opinions that they have robbed themselves of the opportunity to think and to learn and to grow.

I have spoken to young people who tell me they are terrified to tweet anything, that they read and re-read their tweets because they fear they will be attacked by their own. The assumption of good faith is dead. What matters is not goodness but the appearance of goodness. We are no longer human beings. We are now angels jostling to out-angel one another. God help us. It is obscene."

"When you run into something interesting, drop everything else and study it."

"When you run into something interesting, drop everything else and study it."

​Skinner suggests taking things moment by moment and following whims to reach the best results. This approach can work wonders in everyday life as well. Following where our passion and curiosity may lead can open up a world of creativity and inspiration. We may even discover something completely new and fascinating just by breaking free of routine.

~ B. F. Skinner, Harvard professor and psychologist,
1956 issue of the medical journal “The American Psychologist” 

quote from Inspiring Quotes email, July 27, 2021

Monday, July 26, 2021

“Consider yourself blessed if you have a passion for anything. Passion is a way of organizing your life..."

“Consider yourself blessed if you have a passion for anything. Passion is a way of organizing your life; otherwise you go off in 20 different directions, and in the end, you wonder what you have.”

~ Fred E. Budinger Jr.

Los Angeles Times
A riddle in the California desert, and one man’s fight to solve it and save himself
https://www.latimes.com/california/story/2021-07-14/a-riddle-in-the-california-desert-and-one-mans-fight-to-save-it
YERMO, Calif.

 

"The Difference between an ordeal and an adventure is your attitude."

"The Difference between an ordeal and an adventure is your attitude."

~ Monika Petrillo, Flyabout [2006]

Thursday, July 22, 2021

Action beats deliberation

 "bias towards action" - you get further by jumping at chances and learning from experiments than you do laboriously planning
~ Amazon founder Jeff Bezos 

"Action beats deliberation."
~ executive coach Tracy Wilk

"Simply start. Don't wait to 'know more', don't wait for the perfect job, don't wait to know what you want to do before you even start."
~ researcher Dalili Bonomi

quoted from:

Inc. 
LinkedIn Asked People to Give Advice to Their 20-Year-Old Self. The Same Lesson Came Up Again and Again
Jessica Stillman, 7/22/2021
https://www.msn.com/en-us/money/other/linkedin-asked-people-to-give-advice-to-their-20-year-old-self-the-same-lesson-came-up-again-and-again/ar-AAMqNRm

Monday, July 19, 2021

“Before you speak, listen. . . ."

“Before you speak, listen.
Before you write, think.
Before you spend, earn.
Before you invest, investigate.
Before you criticize, wait.
Before you pray, forgive.
Before you quit, try.
Before you retire, save.
Before you die, give.”

~ William Arthur Ward, motivational writer
(December 17, 1921–March 30, 1994) 

"completely fearless, absurdly happy, and in constant trouble”

“Jesus promised his disciples three things—that they would be completely fearless, absurdly happy, and in constant trouble.”

~ William Barclay, The Daily Study Bible Series: The Gospel of Luke


God's Agape Love for You: Unconquerable Benevolence

 “Agape, the Christian word, means unconquerable benevolence.
It means that, no matter what people may do to us by way of insult or injury or humiliation, we will never seek anything else but their highest good.”

~ William Barclay, The Daily Study Bible Series: The Letters to the Galatians and Ephesians

Sunday, July 18, 2021

agentic: decisive, assertive, competitive

Paternity leave: The hidden barriers keeping men at work

By Josie Cox, 12th July 2021, accessed July 18, 2021

quote:

Thekla Morgenroth, a research fellow in Social and Organisational Psychology at the University of Exeter, UK, says that gender stereotypes have persisted, even though gender roles at work have changed substantially in the last few decades, with much higher numbers of women entering and staying in the workforce. 

“Women are no longer seen as less competent than men, but women continue to be seen as more communal – warm, nurturing and caring – than men and, in turn, as more suitable for roles that require these attributes such as childcare,” they explain. “Men, on the other hand, continue to be seen as more agentic: decisive, assertive, competitive.”

https://www.bbc.com/worklife/article/20210712-paternity-leave-the-hidden-barriers-keeping-men-at-work

-------------------------------------------------------------

a·gen·tic   (ā-jen'tik)

Denotes self-directed actions aimed at personal development or personally chosen goals.

Medical Dictionary for the Health Professions and Nursing © Farlex 2012

https://medical-dictionary.thefreedictionary.com/agentic

Tuesday, July 13, 2021

"To Help Haiti, Stop Trying to Save It"

 OPINION

"To Help Haiti, Stop Trying to Save It"

By Bret Stephens

Treating people as helpless has a way of making them so.

New York Times The Morning email, July 13, 2021

"I’m Not Just a Kid Who Did Something Wrong"

 "I’m Not Just a Kid Who Did Something Wrong"

~ Emmanuel Durón, 19, Edinburg, Texas

New York Times The Morning email, July 13, 2021

A high school football player in Texas became infamous when he did the unthinkable, leveling a referee. With grace from the ref, the player is seeking a new start.

https://www.nytimes.com/2021/07/12/sports/texas-high-school-football-assault-referee.html

"you're as good as the best thing you've ever done"

 "Remember, you're as good as the best thing you've ever done."

~ Billy Wilder, filmmaker and screenwriter

"we are rarely as good as the best thing we've done, but neither are we as bad as the worst thing we've ever done"

 quotes:

We should judge people - political candidates, our neighbors, or even ourselves - in more nuanced ways than we typically do. Singular acts, good or bad, should be taken seriously, but they should not typically bear the sole burden of defining our judgments about the moral worth of anyone. . . .

I am not saying anything goes. There are folks who habitually say stupid or offensive things. There are folks who relentlessly hurt others. And there are folks with whom we disagree across the board. I am not saying that we should overlook these patterns. I am simply recommending that we judge the particulars in terms of the bigger picture of someone's life as it has been lived.

In sum, at least in the moral domain, we are rarely as good as the best thing we've done, but neither are we as bad as the worst thing we've ever done.

~ Christopher Peterson Ph.D.

Are We as Bad as the Worst Thing We’ve Ever Done?

The Good Life blog, Posted January 20, 2012

https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/the-good-life/201201/are-we-bad-the-worst-thing-we-ve-ever-done

“Each of us is more than the worst thing we’ve ever done”

“Each of us is more than the worst thing we’ve ever done” 

~ Bryan Stevenson, Just Mercy: A Story of Justice and Redemption

"you feel like you're alone, but people can relate"

Hidden haiku from an interview with Jeanie Buss, the Los Angeles Lakers owner and a standup comic: 

“These things happen and /
 you feel like you’re alone, but /
 people can relate.”

New York Times The Morning email, July 13, 2021

Monday, July 12, 2021

"We've got to get on together and we've got to look after what we've got."

David Makay, the Scottish spaceman piloting Sir Richard Branson's Virgin Galactic flight, says we've got to get on together and we’ve got to care for what we have - it is a small planet:

"But when you're up in space you're looking directly down... the colours on the ground look incredibly vivid and in contrast to this incredibly dark sky.

"And then on top of all that you see so much of the curvature of the Earth and you get a sense of scale of the planet and you realise it's not very big."

He said: "It's the remoteness and fragility and our utter dependence on the thinness of the atmosphere. 

"I would like to think that some of the outcomes are people will take more care of what they're doing, be much more open minded about who we are all - we're all one human race and we're all sharing this small planet that's so remote. 

"There's nothing else practically habitable within reach. We've got to get on together and we've got to look after what we've got."

https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-scotland-highlands-islands-57786412  accessed 7/11/2021

Everything You Love

 "Everything you love comes from God.

When it dies, it returns to God.

God knows that you need love,
so he will send love back to you
in another form."

~ Truthful Grace, July 12, 2021

Friday, July 09, 2021

Home

"Home is not where you were born.
Home is where all your attempts to escape cease."

~ Omar Taher, writer


"Home is the place where, when you have to go there,
They have to take you in."

~ Robert Frost, The Death of the Hired Man


“Winter is the time for comfort,
for good food and warmth,
for the touch of a friendly hand
and for a talk beside the fire:
it is the time for home.”

~ Edith Sitwell


“After all," Anne had said to Marilla once, "I believe the nicest and sweetest days are not those on which anything very splendid or wonderful or exciting happens but just those that bring simple little pleasures, following one another softly, like pearls slipping off a string.”

~ Lucy Maud Montgomery,  Anne of Avonlea


“We leave something of ourselves behind when we leave a place, we stay there, even though we go away. And there are things in us that we can find again only by going back there.”

~ Pascal Mercier, Night Train to Lisbon


“There is nothing more admirable than when two people who see eye to eye keep house as man and wife, confounding their enemies and delighting their friends.”

~ Homer, The Odyssey


“What is home? My favorite definition is 'a safe place,' a place where one is free from attack, a place where one experiences secure relationships and affirmation. It's a place where people share and understand each other. Its relationships are nurturing. The people in it do not need to be perfect; instead, they need to be honest, loving, supportive, recognizing a common humanity that makes all of us vulnerable.”

~ Gladys Hunt, Honey for a Child's Heart: The Imaginative Use of Books in Family Life


“Home isn't where you're from, it's where you find light when all grows dark.”

~ Pierce Brown, Golden Son

Thursday, July 08, 2021

"I close myself off from so much of the world"

“Dandelions remind me of the way I close myself off from so much of the world, either because it’s too painful to see or feel, or because when I am open to people, the ridicule comes.”

~ Dara McAnulty, “Diary of a Young Naturalist,” on the natural world around his home and on his autism

In 2020, “Diary of a Young Naturalist” won the Wainwright Prize, Britain’s biggest award for nature writing.

from The New York Times "Evening Briefing" email, July 8, 2021

"life is a trouble”

“Well, I think life is a trouble”. 

~ Queen Elizabeth II, July, 2021

https://twitter.com/i/status/1413080022265499651 

Monday, July 05, 2021

"Success is a collection of problems solved."

"Success is a collection of problems solved."

~ I. M. Pei

quote from Inspiring Quotes email, July 5, 2021:

As an internationally renowned architect, I. M. Pei was well-versed in the power of problem-solving. Two of his most famous building designs, the John F. Kennedy Library and the Hancock Tower in Boston, faced numerous issues along the way, but Pei felt that such challenging projects helped toughen him as an architect, and would stand the test of time. Pei’s words ... remind us that our satisfaction at the finish line actually springs from the hardships we overcame along the way.

Friday, July 02, 2021

"Discovering the truth about ourselves is a lifetime’s work, but it’s worth the effort."

"Discovering the truth about ourselves is a lifetime’s work, but it’s worth the effort."

~ Fred Rogers, creator and host of “Mister Rogers’ Neighborhood,” which ran from 1968 to 2001. 

quote from Inspiring Quotes email, July 2, 2021:

A major theme of his show was helping kids to understand their emotions, to know that “feelings are mentionable and manageable.” But Mister Rogers also acknowledged that it can take a lifetime to understand and love ourselves for the complicated, wonderful human beings that we are.

Thursday, July 01, 2021

"The only thing we have to fear is fear itself."

"The only thing we have to fear is fear itself."

~ President Franklin D. Roosevelt, in the throes of the Great Depression