Dad: Ever with us
Life with father has staying power.
By Sally Friedman
For The Inquirer
When Sean, a type 1 (juvenile) diabetic, was at a St. Louis boarding school, Thomas Toner insisted he compete in hockey and tennis with kids who were both far healthier and far more skilled than his son.
"He often told me that you only get better by playing tougher opponents, and he made sure that I did."
When his son needed dialysis for failing kidneys, his father dismissed it as an "oil change." When he underwent a double kidney/pancreas transplant in 1995, Thomas Toner likened it to "replacing car parts."
"But in the end, that tough love/live strong approach actually was helpful. My father taught me to absolutely expect challenges, and to finesse them." ...
"But through what may have seemed his indifference, my father had actually taught me about the relative insignificance of the body, and the message took. I accepted being blind and in some ways embraced it," says Toner, who lives in Bryn Mawr, has won or been a finalist in 14 regional and national writing competitions, and serves as vice president of the Philadelphia Writers Conference.
He is also a frequent speaker about living and working with a disability.
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