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Married couples can find it easier to widen each others' worlds and reap the benefits of shared meaning and memories.
They're also shored-up by the respect society offers those who trouble to state, publicly, their relationship's importance. And if the obstacle race works out, at the end, if they're lucky, they approach the finish with somebody to remind them where they left their spare teeth.
But magic only works if you believe in it, if you don't simply work at marriage, but play at and relish it. Studies find that the more optimistic your expectations, the greater your demands, the more marriage will give you.
Magic only works if you believe in it, if you don't simply work at marriage, but play at and relish it.
If you seek the best, keep noticing each other, complain well but criticise less, and don't let leisure slide. (Although husbands tend to enjoy more free time, according to latest research, wives' pleasures have greater impact on whether a union is happy.)
Try a psychological trick called 'positive-sentiment override'. If your beloved snaps at you, don't snap back or take it personally. No, they're having a bad day.
With care, luck and selective attention, the ball and chain can weigh lighter than ever.
Catherine Blyth, author of The Art of Marriage (John Murray, £12.99). www.catherineblyth.com
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