"Good relationships keep us happier and healthier."

quotes:

In 2003, the psychiatrist Robert Waldinger accepted a new job at Harvard, where he had long been affiliated, overseeing one of its most prized research projects. . . . Waldinger, the fourth steward of the Harvard study, was moved by the consistency of his own research. . . .

 Much of it added up to one key insight: “The clearest message that we get from this 75-year study is this: Good relationships keep us happier and healthier. Period,” he said in a TED Talk in 2015. Strong, long-term relationships with spouses, family and friends built on deep trust — not achievement, not fortune or fame — were what predicted well-being. Waldinger had worried that his big reveal was so intuitive that he would be laughed off the stage; instead, the talk is one of TED’s most watched to date, with more than 40 million views.

"How Nearly a Century of Happiness Research Led to One Big Finding" By Susan Dominus, May 1, 2025, New York Times,
https://www.nytimes.com/2025/05/01/magazine/happiness-research-studies-relationships.html

This "key insight" is actually 2,000-year-old wisdom:

Gospel
John 13:34-35 NRSV
Jesus Christ: "I give you a new commandment, that you love one another. Just as I have loved you, you also should love one another. By this everyone will know that you are my disciples, if you have love for one another."

“reconcili-action” — moving from words to deeds

The next pope will inherit Pope Francis' mixed legacy with Indigenous people

Story by PETER SMITH, April 29, 2025, Associated Press

quotes: 

Perhaps the most dramatic of [Pope] Francis’ encounters with the Indigenous community occurred on a July day in 2022 in Maskwacis, a small town in the Canadian province of Alberta and the hub of four Cree nations.

There, Pope Francis paid respects at a cemetery near a former residential school for Indigenous children. He then delivered a long-sought apology for Catholic complicity in the 19th- and 20th-century residential school system for the First Nations, Metis and Inuit people of Canada.

“I am deeply sorry, sorry for the ways in which, regrettably, many Christians supported the colonizing mentality of the powers that oppressed the Indigenous peoples,” Francis said.

The Rev. Cristino Bouvette recalled being unexpectedly emotional at that moment.

Bouvette, an Alberta priest of Cree and Metis heritage who was liturgical coordinator for the pope’s Canada visit, recalled hearing the applause and seeing some onlookers weeping. 

. . .

“It’s 150 years of trauma. It’s going to take us a bit of time to recover,” said Wilton Littlechild, a residential school survivor and former Grand Chief of the Confederacy of Treaty Six First Nations in Canada. “He put us on a real strong path to reconciliation, but it can’t stop.”

. . .

Doctrine of Discovery

In 2023, the Vatican formally repudiated the Doctrine of Discovery, which legitimized colonial-era seizure of Native lands by Spain and Portugal. The concept forms the basis of some property laws today in the United States.

The Vatican said the related decrees, or papal bulls, “did not adequately reflect the equal dignity and rights of Indigenous peoples” and have never been considered expressions of the Catholic faith.

Fernie Marty, an elder in Sacred Heart Church of the First Peoples, a parish that uses Native language and customs, said the action showed the pope was moving from words to deeds — what Marty called “reconcili-action.”

“I thought, wow, this is another proof that he’s on the right track,” he said.

But Lopez said Francis didn’t go far enough by not rescinding the papal bulls. To Lopez, that means they’re still technically on the books.

Not only do Native people have historical traumas, Lopez said, but the church itself needs healing from the “soul wound” of this legacy. But it has to fully make amends, he said.

https://www.msn.com/en-us/news/us/the-next-pope-will-inherit-pope-francis-mixed-legacy-with-indigenous-people/ar-AA1DOg4e   as of 4/29/2025

“high I.Q.s serve as a force multiplier for both positive and negative traits.”

quote: 

The pollster Nate Silver guessed that Musk is “probably even a ‘genius,’” and theorized that he may not always appear that way because, as he put it on X, “high I.Q.s serve as a force multiplier for both positive and negative traits.”

https://www.nytimes.com/2025/04/05/arts/what-is-elon-musks-iq.html

"What Is Elon Musk’s I.Q.?" by Amanda Hess, April 5, 2025, New York Times

"The Jewish Jesus was a total badass."

"These days I go to church more than synagogue. But I've learned you can't take the Jew out of the boy. I'm attracted to Jesus the Jew, not the wispy, ethereal, gentle-faced guy with his two fingers in the air whom Christians have invented and put into centuries of European paintings. The Jewish Jesus emerged amid revolution, violence and strife. He walked into the center of all the clashing authority structures and he overturned them all. The Jewish Jesus was a total badass."

~ David Brooks, 
from his essay “The Shock of Faith: It’s Nothing Like I Thought It Would Be”

“When a clown moves into a palace . . . "

“When a clown moves into a palace he doesn’t become a sultan, the palace instead becomes a circus."

~ Turkish proverb

Barack Obama on Change, 2008

“Change will not come if we wait for some other person or some other time. We are the ones we’ve been waiting for. We are the change that we seek.”

Barack Obama, President of the United States 2009-2017

Elon Musk on "civilizational suicidal empathy"

Snopes.com fact check:

Elon Musk said these words during a Feb. 28, 2025, episode of "The Joe Rogan Experience" podcast, from around the 1:16:00 mark:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sSOxPJD-VNo 

Musk: There's a guy who posts on X who's great, Gad Saad?*

Rogan: Yeah, he's a friend of mine. He's been on the podcast a bunch of times. 

Musk: Yeah, he's awesome, and he talks about, you know, basically suicidal empathy. Like, there's so much empathy that you actually suicide yourself. So, we've got civilizational suicidal empathy going on. And it's like, I believe in empathy, like, I think you should care about other people, but you need to have empathy for, for civilization as a whole, and not commit to a civilizational suicide. 

Rogan: Also don't let someone use your empathy against you so they can completely control your state and then do an insanely bad job of managing it and never get removed.

Musk: The fundamental weakness of Western civilization is empathy. The empathy exploit. They're exploiting a bug in Western civilization, which is the empathy response. So, I think, you know, empathy is good, but you need to think it through and not just be programmed like a robot. 

Rogan: Right, understand when empathy has been actually used as a tool.

Musk: Yes, like, its weaponized empathy is the issue.

Source:  Snopes.com "Yes, Musk said 'The fundamental weakness of Western civilization is empathy.' Here's context"

https://www.snopes.com/fact-check/elon-musk-empathy-quote/  

* Saad is an atheist who describes himself as culturally Jewish.  (Zeitlin, Alan (26 May 2021). "Jewish author Gad Saad stares down the growing tide of antisemitism". The Jerusalem Post.)

Copilot definition of empathy vs. sympathy

Empathy and sympathy are related but distinct concepts:

Sympathy: Involves feeling compassion, sorrow, or pity for someone else's hardships. It is an external expression of concern for someone who is experiencing something difficult. 

Empathy: Involves understanding and sharing another person's feelings by imagining yourself in their situation. It is an internal emotional response that allows you to connect with someone else's emotional experience. 

In summary, sympathy is about feeling for someone, while empathy is about feeling with someone.

https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/empathy

: the action of understanding, being aware of, being sensitive to, and vicariously experiencing the feelings, thoughts, and experience of another

also : the capacity for this

“Everybody can be great...because anybody can serve. . . . "

“Everybody can be great...because anybody can serve. You don't have to have a college degree to serve. You don't have to make your subject and verb agree to serve. You only need a heart full of grace. A soul generated by love.”

~ Martin Luther King Jr.

"If your God never disagrees with you, you might be worshiping an idealized version of yourself."

"If your God never disagrees with you, you might be worshiping an idealized version of yourself."

~ Rev. Tim Keller

20 LESSONS FROM LIFE

 20 LESSONS FROM LIFE

1. Life isn't fair, but it's still good.
2. When in doubt, just take the next small step.
3. Life is too short - enjoy it.
4. Your job won't take care of you when you are sick. Your friends and family will.
5. Pay off your credit cards every month.
6. You don't have to win every argument. Stay true to yourself.
7. Cry with someone. It's more healing than crying alone.
8. Save for retirement starting with your first paycheck.
9. When it comes to chocolate, resistance is futile.
10. Make peace with your past so it won't screw up the present.
11. It's okay to let your children see you cry.
12. Don't compare your life to others. You have no idea what their journey is all about.
13. If a relationship must be a secret, you shouldn't be in it.
14. Take a deep breath. It calms the mind.
15. Get rid of anything that isn't useful. Clutter weighs you down in many ways.
16. Whatever doesn't kill you really does make you stronger.
17. It's never too late to be happy. But it's all up to you and no one else.
18. Over prepare, then go with the flow.
19. No one oversees your happiness but you.
20. Frame every so-called disaster with these words: "in five years will this matter?"

Church of the Brethren

from "Bread for the Journey" by Henri J.M. Nouwen

from Bread for the Journey by Henri J.M. Nouwen:

“To console does not mean to take away pain but rather to be there and say, ‘You are not alone, I am with you.  Together we can carry the burden.  Don’t be afraid.  I am here.’  That is consolation.  We all need to give it as well as receive it.”

"The art of practical therapeutics"

"The art of practical therapeutics involves keeping the patient entertained, while nature effects a cure."

~ Voltaire (1694-1778)

Late Fragment by Raymond Carver

Late Fragment

by Raymond Carver

And did you get what
you wanted from this life, even so?

I did.

And what did you want?

To call myself beloved, to feel myself
beloved on the earth.

'How might you have changed that situation?'

 2-time CEO always asks this question in interviews: It shows if candidates ‘just want to complain’

Story by Gili Malinsky, 2/27/2025

https://www.msn.com/en-us/money/careersandeducation/2-time-ceo-always-asks-this-question-in-interviews-it-shows-if-candidates-just-want-to-complain/ar-AA1zVcDW

quotes:

Serial entrepreneur David Royce has been building companies for years. . . .

In his decades building businesses, Royce has identified some immediate red flags when interviewing job candidates. One is negative talk about former employers. 

"It's totally okay to have both positive and negative things" to say about them, he says. But if a candidate focuses mostly on the negative, "then the problem is likely" that person.

As such, Royce has a question he likes to ask people he's interviewing to suss out their disposition.

'How might you have changed that situation?' . . .

"Tell me about your previous employer," he says. "What are some things that they could do to improve?" . . .

For any pitfalls they mention, he asks, "how might you have changed that situation?" . . .

"Are they constructive in the way they critique," giving examples of how they would've or could've solved the problem, or do they "just want to complain about it?" . . . [and] drag down the morale of the whole team.

"The No. 1 thing that makes A players want to leave is B players and certainly C players," he says. People who aren't focused on producing and creating a positive environment can "spoil your culture and then potentially force out the best talent."

When choosing who to hire, "I want to make sure somebody is generally positive and looking for opportunities to or ways to improve," he says.

"Faith is taking the first step even when you don't see the whole staircase."

"Faith is taking the first step even when you don't see the whole staircase."

~ Martin Luther King, Jr.

"'Aslan,' said Lucy, 'you're bigger.'"

quote: 

"'Aslan,' said Lucy, 'you're bigger.'

'That is because you are older, little one,' answered he.

'Not because you are?'

'I am not. But every year you grow, you will find me bigger.'"

~ C.S. Lewis, Prince Caspian, 1951.

“We may have as much of God as we will."

“We may have as much of God as we will. Christ puts the key of the treasure-chamber into our hand, and bids us take all that we want. If a man is admitted into the bullion vault of a bank and told to help himself, and comes out with one cent, whose fault is it that he is poor?”

Alexander MacLaren,
the great Scottish Bible expositor

"Their prison is only in their minds, yet they are in that prison; and . . . cannot be taken out.”"

“They have chosen cunning instead of belief. Their prison is only in their minds, yet they are in that prison; and so afraid of being taken in that they cannot be taken out.”

~ C.S. Lewis, The Last Battle

https://www.goodreads.com/work/quotes/1059917-the-last-battle

"all find what they truly seek”

 quotes:

“Then I fell at his feet and thought, Surely this is the hour of death, for the Lion (who is worthy of all honour) will know that I have served Tash all my days and not him. Nevertheless, it is better to see the Lion and die than to be Tisroc of the world and live and not to have seen him. 

But the Glorious One bent down his golden head and touched my forehead with his tongue and said, Son, thou art welcome. 

But I said, Alas Lord, I am no son of thine but the servant of Tash. 

He answered, Child, all the service thou hast done to Tash, I account as service done to me. 

Then by reasons of my great desire for wisdom and understanding, I overcame my fear and questioned the Glorious One and said, Lord, is it then true, as the Ape said, that thou and Tash are one? 

The Lion growled so that the earth shook (but his wrath was not against me) and said, It is false. Not because he and I are one, but because we are opposites, I take to me the services which thou hast done to him. For I and he are of such different kinds that no service which is vile can be done to me, and none which is not vile can be done to him. Therefore if any man swear by Tash and keep his oath for the oath’s sake, it is by me that he has truly sworn, though he know it not, and it is I who reward him. And if any man do a cruelty in my name, then, though he says the name Aslan, it is Tash whom he serves and by Tash his deed is accepted. Dost thou understand, Child? 

I said, Lord, though knowest how much I understand. But I said also (for the truth constrained me), Yet I have been seeking Tash all my days. 

Beloved, said the Glorious One, unless thy desire had been for me thou wouldst not have sought so long and so truly. For all find what they truly seek.”

~ C.S. Lewis, The Last Battle

https://www.goodreads.com/work/quotes/1059917-the-last-battle

“Emeth came walking forward into the open strip of grass between the bonfire and the Stable. His eyes were shining, his face was solemn, his hand was on his sword-hilt, and he carried his head high. Jill felt like crying when she looked at his face. 

And Jewel whispered in the King's ear, "By the Lion's Mane, I almost love this young warrior, Calormene though he be. He is worthy of a better god than Tash.”

~ C.S. Lewis, The Last Battle

https://www.goodreads.com/work/quotes/1059917-the-last-battle

“Those who are hurt … will eventually strike back.”

“Those who are hurt …

will eventually strike back.”

~ W.H. Auden